just a normal girl.
average l0oking, plump and not bright.

being pretty and having the figure has an advantage.
everyone likes pretty people, don't they?
d0nt even mention if they've got the brains.
maybe s0me of them would be stucked up but well .. pretty people JUST have this advantage
it's just too bad for people like me.
esp having no confidence in myself and always acting stupid in front of people.
maybe it's high time i change.

what do u picture urself to be in the near future?
seriously, for me, i didn't realli think of that and have no idea.
im a lazy girl who loves to slack ; being like this has prices to pay.
my results suffered the most i believe.
being lazy and not trying hard, despite putting ur best effort in doing the projects.
im just rushing them to meet the criteria for passing and to meet the deadlines.
some of which i really feel i put my heart and soul ; time and effort in doing them, i do expect more.
but maybe, it's just me and not the content of the brain.
it's just me, not putting enough effort into whatever things i do.
having said all this, i dont have the confidence of me changing for the better.
i've been like this and temptations just have to get me everytime.
the thought of just NOT studying or doing proj == NICE.
i think in the first place i didn't even set mine mind into doing this.
so maybe the confidence part was just a factor to it.

we just tend to regret when things happen.
but well, we all know it's too late.
always wanting to turn back time so that the mistakes made would be erased.
seriously, does that help?
but well, who actually knows? cos what's done is done.
there's no such thing as turning back time.

i've always not like people who are rich since sec0ndary sch0ol.
FUCK.
you can sae im jealous/envy of them cos i think i partially am.
being able to not worry about anything and get whatever and whichever you want.
tell me, who dont want that?
i noe im just being childish here cos i know money is not what matters most.
but well ; i JUST wanna rant and say it all.
coming back to people who are rich.
if you are rich, STOP FLAUNTING LA.
i noe u can cos u have that fucking money but seriously, just fuck off.
sometimes it's just not money that matters.
u have to use ur BRAIN.
think before u actually say something or act.
sometimes these people just seem so CHILDISH and SPOILT to me.
i noe it's big fuck having those money.
it's just fine if u dont flaunt and start sh0oting ur m0uth off spouting nonsense which pricks and irritates the ear.

i've always not like my family.
it's just all about money.
if anything were to happen to them i dont deny i would just get sad and worry.
but it's just like this.
i dont like the way my dad acts, u can say i totally dislike him.
i dont like my mum for being so awfully bias.
im fine w my two bro except that my younger bro doesn't think ; he should buck up and study.
those bonds are not there.
but i see that my elder bro has gotten better after he gone army ..
maybe that makes the difference.
but me and him is just the same.
my relatives say im still childish/haven't grow up ; but fuck ; do they know what's it like?
they say, outsiders know best?[okay it's in chi(- -] 旁观者清pang guan zhe qing
like .. AS IF! they are so not me and they dont know how i feel.
so i just dont like to talk to them or anyone about this cos there's no conclusion.
maybe i'll just learn as times passes or whatever shit.
but till then .. it'll just remain the same.

okay guess im getting too emo here so i shall stop.